Waves of 2023

Feeling deeply loved and supported by the people I love.

Going through the ebbs and flows of a breakup.

Releasing my frustrations through exercise.

Exploring shame associated with my body.

Getting my first job offer within a month of job-searching.

Meditating every morning.

A rescinded job offer.

Morning cuddles with Gucci (my dog).

Feeling out of place in the suburbs of Virginia.

Feeling like I’m home every time I visit New York City.

Job interviews draining my emotional energy.

My sister getting her first big girl apartment in NYC.

Seeing my friends find activities that energize them: pole dancing, writing a cookbook, taking a ceramics class, trying standup comedy.

Daily calls with my best friends.

Meeting new people in D.C.

Learning something new every day: the psychology behind imposter syndrome, analyzing trends and data patterns, and learning how my past has shaped my best and worst qualities.

Completing this exercise made me realize the different shades of experiences that make up life. Some have caused me heartbreak and sorrow, while others have made me feel more belonged and understood. I’m deeply grateful for the things I have in my life today, which were missing before. Combating loneliness has been a recurring theme in my life. I now understand that a big reason for this is that I moved to a completely unfamiliar, unknown country at age 11. I struggled to believe that others would accept me for who I am. I realized that accepting all parts of myself, including the different, quirky ones, is the best thing I can do for myself. I am fortunate to have a handful of people in my life who have witnessed parts of me that I used to feel ashamed of, yet they still choose to love and accept me unconditionally.

One thing I’ve realized is how many life transitions I’ve experienced in my twenties. I moved to San Francisco alone, barely knowing anyone. I jumped from my big tech job to a fast-paced startup. I moved to NYC. I quit my job to travel for four months, without another job lined up. I’ve taken plenty of chances in life, some not by choice, but most by my own volition. Taking these risks has shown me my strengths: adaptability, courage, independence, and confidence. Most of these circumstances required an unwavering belief in myself, a belief that I will come out on the other side despite uncertainty and ambiguity. While I don’t always feel courageous or confident, I take comfort in knowing that my life experiences have equipped me with the skills and attitude to overcome any challenge.

Reflect back on transitions in your own life. What strengths did you bring to deal with these life transitions?